Wednesday, May 22, 2013

Re-assigning Assignment

I led Halkkor down the long hallway toward the soon-to-be-remodeled waiting room.

We stepped into the wide expanse of chairs and tables and magazine racks and confused, scared souls.  "So all this," I said, "we're turning into a hallway?"

"Yes," Halkkor answered, looking around grimly.  "This is a disorganized mess.  A simple first-in, first-out line would make things much, much simpler."

"Okay," I said.  "Should we get the Department of Development started on the renovations?"

"Yes, but first we'll need to inform the Department of Assignment of the changes.  That way they can adapt quickly to our new policies."  He turned to me expectantly.  "Where is the Director?"

I wordlessly led him back into the hallway and toward the door marked Exam Office.  "Here we are," I announced before barging in.

Winston Phelps, my melancholy human Director of Assignment, and his demon aide Dramien were both closely examining some file on the desk in front of them.  They looked up sharply when they heard me enter. "Hello, boys," I said.

"Sir," Winston acknowledged blandly.  His eyes widened as he saw Halkkor's hulking form enter the room.

In answer to his unspoken question, I said, "This is Halkkor.  He and I are jointly in charge."

Dramien narrowed his eyes at Halkkor as though he were both sizing him up and trying to give himself a brain aneurysm.  "So much for the Devil being the supreme overlord of Hell," he muttered with a sarcastic glance in my direction.

Ignoring him, I announced, "We've decided to change the way our assignment system works."

"Change?" Winston said, almost sounding excited--or maybe scared.  "How?"

"We'll be abandoning the current waiting room in favor of a single-file line," Halkkor summarized.  "The needlessly complex system of assignment will be replaced with a more elegant, less nuanced arrangement."

"So, what, we're being downsized?" Dramien said.

"Pretty much," I replied.  "We're thinking that the whole operation could be run by just the two of you."

No comments:

Post a Comment