Wednesday, February 12, 2014

Concerning Heaven

I started thinking out loud.

"Heaven wants me to trust my instincts," I muttered.  "So I guess that means I should just keep doing what I want and that's somehow supposed to be the right thing."

"Did you say 'Heaven'?" General Gavsot asked sharply.

"Whoa, whoa, back it up, when did you talk to somebody from Heaven?" Gus asked.

"I didn't even know it was a real thing," Sylnie murmured.

"When I died," I explained distractedly.  "Both times.  I woke up in Heaven and got sent back."

"That is not possible," Gavsot whispered angrily.  He appeared to be talking to himself.

"You went to Heaven?  And they sent you back to Hell?" Gus asked incredulously.  "Why the hell would they do that?"

"They said I was an asset to them and they needed me to do something," I said.  "But I don't know what."

"How can you be sure it was Heaven?" Sylnie said pointedly.

I stared at her.  I hadn't realized until that moment that I'd unconditionally believed everything Conrad had told me.  Sure, he was my great grandfather, but this was the same guy that had taken so much sick pleasure out of duping me into taking over his job.  How could I assume that he was trustworthy now?  Was anything he told me the truth?  Had I actually been to Heaven?

"Okay, so fuck this," I announced.  "I don't know what the deal is with Niven or with Heaven, but I think it's time to be a little more proactive.  I'm calling a meeting for all the Department Directors and we're going to figure out a way to protect ourselves so that no matter what's going on here…we'll handle it."

Gus smiled broadly.  "That's the Boss-Man I serve with pride!" he said, perhaps a little too sycophantically.  "Sounds like you need to whip up a Satanic Order and call yourself a Council of Hell."

Perhaps as a symbol of my renewed drive, I took off my bloodied shirt, baring a manly chest I'd never come close to possessing in life.  Then I sat down at my computer and started typing up Satanic Order #53464554.

9 comments:

  1. I just pictured a Hulk-type chest baring, and then him sitting at this tiny little computer and typing on it with these huge hands.

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    1. Heh. Well, Jason isn't green, but that's pretty much how I pictured it.

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  2. I think Jason should probably NOT have mentioned he has a potential relationship with Heaven to a room full of demons from Hell. This is probably going to knock off at least one ally (my bets are on the General).

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    1. That's a good point!

      (insert mischievous smile here)

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  3. Has there only been 53 million satanic orders since the creation of hell? that seems a little low

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    1. Well...if we go with the theory that Hell has only been in operation for about 6000 years, by my math that's more than 20 a day. But Jason definitely isn't helping bring that average up.

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  4. Has there only been 53 million satanic orders since the creation of hell? that seems a little low

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  5. I literally fell asleep at my desk reading this story last night. Not many stories make me want to pull an all-nighter. Great job :)
    -TD

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    1. Haha, thank you! I hope your back didn't cramp up or anything from napping in your chair.

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